A second later my phone dinged again. “PORN. Your blog is covered with porn!” I nodded. Ah-hah, there were the synapses I was looking for! This strangely made more sense to me now. Of course a wholesome Mormon’s phone would autocorrect to “poems.” I quickly clicked on my website while simultaneously pressing on the gas to get home. I am admittedly not a great connoisseur of porn, but that there was definitely Asian porn. I had been hacked.
Dear Daughters, I know you are all at ages where listening to me is utterly monotonous. I get it. Trust me, Dad has felt it for 15 long years. However, …
Broc- GOD!!! Nice to see you again! (Runs up to God to smell crotch) God- Broccoli! You returned right on schedule! You lived a long life on earth my friend. …
For those of you who do not follow me on Facebook, my precious lab passed away a little over a week ago. Right now I feel heartbroken, lost, numb, guilty, …
Lisa: Did you know our vaginas are atrophying as we speak? Erin: Duh. This is why I suffer from anxiety. I lie awake every night worrying about my old vagina. …
