Dear Daughters, I know you are all at ages where listening to me is utterly monotonous. I get it. Trust me, Dad has felt it for 15 long years. However, …
Spell Dog Backwards
Broc- GOD!!! Nice to see you again! (Runs up to God to smell crotch) God- Broccoli! You returned right on schedule! You lived a long life on earth my friend. …
Dog Almost Gone It
For those of you who do not follow me on Facebook, my precious lab passed away a little over a week ago. Right now I feel heartbroken, lost, numb, guilty, …
Our Lips Are Sealed
Lisa: Did you know our vaginas are atrophying as we speak? Erin: Duh. This is why I suffer from anxiety. I lie awake every night worrying about my old vagina. …
Don’t Touch Brown Coral
My daughter picked up a human shit on the beach. Yep. Ya’ read it right. We had just arrived at our relaxing island destination for vacation. Our room wasn’t ready …