Lisa: Did you know our vaginas are atrophying as we speak? Erin: Duh. This is why I suffer from anxiety. I lie awake every night worrying about my old vagina. …

Lisa: Did you know our vaginas are atrophying as we speak? Erin: Duh. This is why I suffer from anxiety. I lie awake every night worrying about my old vagina. …
Erin: (Laying on Lisa’s table getting face lasered) “Ow. That fucking hurts. Are you about to start your period? Based on the joy you are eliciting from afflicting pain on …
Okay, we have processed and are finally ready to talk about it…Deep breath… Lisa’s Version I was recently contacted by a Coolsculpt representative who wanted Erin and I to have …
Erin: I have decided we are going to go get Brazilian waxes. Lisa: Okay. Erin: That went over better than I thought it would. You are drinking wine, watching Lifetime …
Lisa’s Version of Events I almost died last week when I accidentally poisoned myself. Three days before I nearly died, I was laying on Erin’s bedroom floor after raiding her …